Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
by jsalomaki
Summary: Holly isn't a normal girl, Alex is just like her in the beginning. But what happens once they really get to know eachother? How will they change one another? How will it end? AlexXOC DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ALEX OR ANY OF THE SETTINGS BASED FROM A CLOCKWORK ORANGE. IM NOT GAINING PROFIT FROM THIS STORY.
1. Welly Welly Well

**Authors Note: Although it was my original purpose to have Holly as a young Irish girl i'm not very good at typing the Irish accent, so i left her vocabulary as english. I also wanted to use the Nadsat vocabulary, but because of not being familiar with it, it isn't going to be heavily used. I will put the english translation behind it for those who struggle with understanding it as much as i do. Viddy Well! On with the story. **

Holly was new to the Britain area and was quite lost at the moment. She wandered up and down the streets all afternoon until she finally stopped to rest at a grocery store. She saw a lady with pink.. or was it purple.. hair walk out of the store. She had on a ghastly red trench coat and red matching hat. As she was walking to her car she dropped one of her bags. Holly rushed over to help her. "Oh my dear thank you!" the lady placed the bags in the car and looked at Holly more properly. "My dear what are you doing out this late? A pretty little lady such as you'self shouldn't be out this late! There are these boys you see, walk around and go after girls like you!" Holly looked at herself, what had the lady meant? She seemed alright. Her simple green t shirt and jeans with some sneakers. "What's your name girl?" the lady asked. "Holly." replied Holly. "And yours?" "I'm Emilie. Listen dear, i mean what i said, a young girl such as yourself shouldn't be out this late. Why don't ya come to my house and stay awhile, till you find your way around? I'm sure the husband won't mind, and my son is never home." "Sure." Holly couldn't pass up such an offer of generosity. Tomorrow she would find her way around.

Holly had assumed the lady was well off with the amount of food she had purchased, the car she was driving, the clothes she was wearing were all wonderful. Of course anyone who worked for the state would be well off, Holly had thought. But when the lady drove into an old apartment building lot and stated this is where her family had lived Holly was surprised. While they walked up the stairs to Emilie's apartment she explained why she had lived in such a wreck. "This used to be a very nice place, but once the landlord passed away no one cared to re-buy the building and everything began to fall apart. The elevator is broken, so now we use the stairs, most of the apartment rooms were vandalized by those boys. But once Alex was born we didn't want to have to move." _So her sons name is Alex_, Holly thought.

After Emilie had made sure Holly felt at home she left for a late shift at work. Holly had fell asleep on the couch with the tv on. She was just about to fall asleep when a boy had walked in wearing all white, with a hat and a cane. What was peculiar about the boy is his left eye had fake eyelashes. despite his unusual (and to Holly) almost comical appearance he was very attractive. His hair was wavy and dirty blonde, and he had bright blue eyes. "Welly welly welly welly welly welly well! To what do i owe the pleasure of a surprising visit from such a beautiful molodoy devotchka (young girl)?"


	2. Korova Milk Bar

"Welly Welly Welly Welly Well! To what do i owe the pleasure of a surprising visit from such a beautiful molodoy devotchka (young girl)?" The boy said. Holly looked at the boy quizzically  
" What did you call me?" she asked. "Oh! Appy-polly loggies (apologies)! I'm speaking nadsat (teen). forgive me most people understand nadsat, though most people don't quite understand why they speak it!" She could tell he was rambling, so she asked what his name was. "My name is Alexander DeLarge, what's yours?" Once Holly had given had given her name to him he smiled and went in his room for the evening. She heard Beethoven emitting from his room and fell asleep to the ninth symphony.

The next morning Holly was walking around town and decided if she was going to live here she might as well make it more permanent. She needed a job and house. She looked in the local paper and saw that the Korova Milk Bar was renting out a flat and also needed a waitress. It seemed all too convenient, but Holly was desperate. When she got to the Milk Bar she walked in and a man about in his thirties was sweeping the floor. He was humming the song Singing In the Rain and didn't seem to realize Holly's presence. "Excuse me?" she said. The man still didn't hear her. She cleared her throat loudly. The man jumped,"Whoa pardon me how'd you get in here?!" "The door was open... should i not be here?" Holly asked politely. "No no please stay for awhile." The man walked behind the bar and started cleaning glasses. "What can i do for you lass?" "I noticed in the paper you had a flat available, i also noticed you had a job available here." She sat down at the bar. "Well the flat is available and you can move in whenever you like, if you're interested, there's already furniture so you needn't to worry 'bout that. As for the job though.." he trailed off. "What is it?" Holly questioned. The man leaned in close to her.  
"Do you know what's sold here miss...?"  
"Holly."  
"Miss Holly, lovely name. Do you know what's sold here Miss Holly?" She thought about it for a second, isn't this like any other bar?  
"I'll let you in on a wee secret Miss Holly, the drinks we sell here aren't exactly... legal."  
Holly thought about this, she'd never thought about having a job like this. But she knew a girl had to do whatever it takes to stay where she wants to stay, and here is where she thought she ought to be.  
"Well my dear you think on it for an evening and come by on later when we get more customers, you'll see what i mean. But for now let's go check out that flat eh?" She followed him throughout the bar pass the several naked lady statues throughout the bar, they went through a doorway into a hall where the bathrooms were and there was a stairway that led up to a couple of apartments. One for Andrew, That was the bar owners name Holly had soon found out, and a couple others for drunken customers to sleep in who couldn't find their way home. Andrew gave Holly a key to room 106 and left her to get settled in.

*******

Later that evening Holly went down to the bar and the place was packed. She hurriedly walked over to the bar pass a few drunken men who were drawing far too much attention to her that she'd like. She sat at the bar waiting for Andrew to come back out from the storage room, as she looked around she saw four boys in the corner of the bar similarly dressed in all white, and then she noticed a familiar face. Alex was one of those boys. He lifted a glass of Moloko (milk) in cheers to her, and smirked as she blushed and left the bar.

**Authors Note: I'm so glad i received my first ever reviews! My appypollyoligies if the introductions are taking so long! I also wasn't sure if the bar owner had a name so i gave him one, not too sure why i attempted to give him an Irish accent because Holly is supposed to be Irish as well. Hopefully will have chapter three up soon! **


	3. Holly's Past

**Authors Note: We get to learn more about Holly and her past. Mostly consisting of flashbacks and Holly's thoughts. PLOT TWIST! SHORT. **

Holly wasn't always so nervous around boys, she can blame it on Francis Davis for ruining her once confident act around boys. At a party when Holly was sixteen it was the first time Holly had snuck out of her house to go to one of Rachel's summer parties. Holly was having a great time she was drinking with her friends and being surrounded by a group of senior boys. It wasn't a surprise Holly was surrounded by boys, she had long wavy brown and ginger hair and bright green almost catlike eyes. She had long black eyelashes that never saw mascara only eyeliner and brown eyeshadow. She was tall and had pale skin that was always smooth and flawless. Francis Davis was a tall six foot brute who was one of the boys surrounding her. He pulled her into a hallway where no one could see them and drunkenly started kissing her and pulling at her clothes. She punched him and pushed him away and ran out to her car. He had followed her pushed her into the passenger seat and drove away with her. Once they got somewhere where no one could find them he forced himself on Holly and Holly was too drunk and weak to fight off Francis. She reached under the seat and found a beer bottle one of her friends had left in her car and broke it against Francis's head. Cursing and holding his head she pushed him off her and managed to push him out of her car. She drove off in tears that night and once she got home she left a note to her parents saying they would never see her again. Holly never stayed in one place for too long. She spent many nights sleeping in her car and drinking her memories away. She forgot her parents names and for awhile didn't even know her own name. One night she woke up in an elderly ladies home and the lady had made sure Holly didn't go anywhere until she was certain Holly had changed her ways. Being kept in a house for a year with the memory of her past Holly had poisoned the elderly lady and stole anything valuable out of her house. When Holly was in a different county she had read in the paper that the old lady she had killed was one of the first women who had been in war, and when she returned she helped children with no home. Holly felt terrible and never wanted to commit such a crime again. She never hurt anyone again, never stole, and never drank. Now three years have past, Francis Holly had later found out was in Jail for raping several women and she felt justice was finally served. She now didn't feel the need to run, nor the need to hide. This is why she came to Britain.

******

There was something about Alex, something that unnerved Holly when she looked at him. He hadn't done anything to her, but something about him.. something wasn't right.


	4. Drugged & Caught

Holly came back to the restaurant flustered from her thoughts of the past. when she sat at one of the bars Andrew put a glass in front of her. It wasn't like the other drinks that looked like regular milk, this drink was purple. "What's this?" Holly asked. He winked at her and walked away. She really didn't want to refuse a drink... but what was it? She didn't know what was added to the drinks. Would Andrew hurt her? Refusing her better judgement she drank the liquid that was actually sweet. A buzz arose in her and her senses had slowly numbed away. And thats exactly how she felt, numb. She forgot why she was at the bar, she forgot who she was. She was looking for someone, who was that person? Where is he now? He. It was a guy. She got up and left the bar. stiletto hidden in her back pocket. While she was wandering she heard a girl screaming in an abandoned casino. She didn't remember what she had put on before she left the bar, but currently she was wearing combat boots, black jeans, a black tank top, a green military jacket, & had an old gas mask hanging from her neck. She knew she couldn't be seen, she knew that this was probably the gang Emilie had warned her about. She put on the mask and snuck around in the dark part of the casino. But before she could step out in the light she heard  
"HoHoHo Ho if it isn't fat stinking Billy Goat Billy Boy in poison.  
How are thou, thou globby bottle of cheap stinking chip-oil.  
Come and get one in the yarbles, if you have any yarbles you unic jelly thou!"

It was Alex. Just then the two groups went after each other smashing chairs and glass windows against each others heads. I saw the girl run into the darkness, i wanted to make sure she was alright so i ran towards her. But one of the boys (the leader from the other gang) had grabbed me and hit me in the stomach. Before i knew what was happening another one had grabbed me and started punching me too! It was the worst feeling ever and i wasn't strong enough to get them off of me. "Welly Welly Welly Well! Billy Boy! You have another member i see? Fiesty little droog you got here? Looks like he could use some straightening up eh?" BillyBoy looked at Alex confused from the ground, he and his gang took quite the beating from Alex's gang but none of them would say i wasn't part of their group. Alex threw me on the ground and before he could take a brick to my head i ripped the gas mask off my face.

**Authors Note: I apologize it's a short chapter! I hope i can crack down on the next one throughout the week. Block scheduling at school means more homework i guess -_- More is coming though! So please have patience my readers! **


	5. Ecstasy & (almost) Ultra violence

**Authors Note: Annnd Action!**

Alex heard sirens and grabbed Holly's arm and pulled her off the ground. He whistled loudly to his droogs, " Police! Let's go Droogies!" Still holding Hollies arm tight he pulled her into a dark part of the casino unlike the rest who had fled into the streets. In a dark hallway Alex pushed Holly against a wall and pinned her arms above her head. "You stupid girl!" he whispered harshly, "You could've gotten in some trouble and i might've not been here to help! Twenty to one is nothing a girl like you needs to be involved in." Hollies heart was banging against her chest in fear of the familiarity what it was like the last time a boy was this close to her. But her body ached, but not just from pain, but more. She wanted Alex more than anything and she knew she could take him right there. She moved her hips against Alex and caught off guard he let her go. Taking advantage of him letting go she grabbed his wrists and pinned him against the wall. Alex began to sweat as Holly leaned close to him and whispered, "I can handle myself Droogie." She grabbed her gas mask which had fell to the floor previously, kissed Alex and walked away in the darkness. As she walked back to the bar she thought about the sudden passion she felt towards Alex, and how good it felt to feel the rush of wanting violence as well. She craved more, she wanted revenge on those filthy dogs she saw harassing that poor girl in the casino. She was going to go after Billyboy herself. But not tonight. Tonight, she needed rest.

By the time she got back to the Korova Milk Bar her head was clear and all seemed well. "How was your evening Holly?" Andrew was cleaning glasses behind the bar again he scanned her body taking in her military appearance. "Didn't cause any trouble i hope?" "Of course not. Is there anything you need me to do before i," She pointed upstairs. "Just take these in the back room there." He pointed to a box of empty bottles. She grabbed the box and walked into the room behind the bar, she noticed Andrew had walked in behind her and closed the door. She knew something bad was about to happen. Thinking quickly she looked around to see if there was anything she could use against him. "You sure seem nervous Holly, do you need another drink?" He held up a bottle with the purple drink in it. Of course, no wonder why Holly had wanted Alex so badly earlier, this drink was spiked with ecstasy, Andrew must've wanted Holly to stay here instead. She took the drink and drank it slowly. Andrew moved towards her with a smile. "Do you like it her Holly? Do you find everything to your liking?"

"Of course i do." She put the bottle down and carefully checked her back pockets to make sure her stiletto was still there, she knew if he came near her any closer she'd know what to do. "What do you think of me?"  
"I think you're... mysterious Andrew, why is it no one knows anything about you?"  
He looked at her darkly grabbed her waist and pushed her against the shelves.  
tonight just isn't my night Holly thought darkly. He tried pulling her jacket off her and pushing his body against her but Holly grabbed her stiletto and held it against his neck. "I dare you to do it! They'll find you! THey'll-" She stabbed him in the chest and ran out of the bar, bloody stiletto in her pocket. yeah they'll find me alright, because police really care about an owner of an illegal shithole.


	6. The Hospital

**Authors Note: I have a picture of Holly on my profile go check it out! Now lets see some more badass-ness. **

Holly walked stumbling down the streets, gas mask on so no one could tell who she was. Stupid, I was stupid to think i'd ever get out of escaping my past. I'm a murderer. A thief. That's who I am. I'm not meant for public display. I should be locked up. I'm just meant to be abused. What do I have left?...I'm not so bad. It's That gang that needs to be locked up. I hope Alex's gang did them in well. But maybe they could use more straightening up...

* * *

Holly was approaching the hospital, she ducked in the nearby alleyway and put her gas mask and military jacket in her over the shoulder bag. She at least looked somewhat normal now, even though she was wearing all black. When she walked in she could feel everyone staring at her. But she ignored it. She needed to focus on her mission. She walked up to the front desk.

"A patient came in here in an ambulance, maybe a couple hours ago? Gang fight over in the casino?"

The receptionist looked at Holly strangely,

" I'm sorry, i can't let you in to see any of those boys right now. They're all in pretty bad shape. you could stop by in the morn-" Holly walked away ignoring the girl.

Holly walked over to a young boy in the waiting room wearing all black with long black hair and dark makeup on. He looked unamused at her until she knelt by him and whispered in his ear, she slipped something in his hand and he walked over to a nearby tv and pushed it off its stand and started kicking it making a horrorshow scene. The startled receptionist started screaming and yelling at him saying he's completely mad.

Holly using this distraction as an advantage snuck past the receptionist desk and went to look for Billyboy and his gang in the ER. But first she needed more of a disguise. She found the laundry closet and slipped into some doctors uniform. She covered her face with a mask and went back out to look for Billyboy's room. It was amazing that no one noticed her, looking at every record outside every door and carrying her biohazard over the shoulder bag. After two hallways and almost getting caught once she finally found it. She grabbed Billyboy's records off his door and knocked. When she opened the door she felt something hard crash against her head. On the floor in pain she ripped the mask off disoriented.

"You! You bitch! Whaddya want eh? You here to do me in? Well not today, no not today love!"

When she looked at him he looked positively mad. His face was covered in dry blood and his hair was all over dishevelled. He was holding Holly's stiletto! She reached for it but he kicked her back down.

"Now now a lil lass such as yer'self shouldn't be playing with such dangerous toys."

He cut at her clothes but only ripping the doctor jacket.

"You asshole! You'll pay for all you've done!" She kicked his legs so he'd trip and when he did the stiletto went across the floor.

Hell if she needed it, she straddled Billyboy and held him down with her body and put her bag on his grabbed a vial and uncapped the needle that was on it.

"What're you doing? Get that away from me!" Billyboy yelled.

She stabbed the needle in his wrist and within seconds his body weakened and gave dragged his body back up on his hospital bed.

She cleaned up the room fast making sure there was no trace of any fight.

When she had everything cleaned up she changed back into her military jacket, put her gas mask back on, put the other clothes in her bag with her stiletto and vial, tossed the needle in a biohazard bin next to the hospital bed, and left out the window.

Good thing it was only a one story hospital.


	7. Safety For Now

**Author's Note: Wrote this bright & early at six o clock! So it's shorter than i'd like it to be. **

* * *

Holly knew she had nowhere to go, and while still stumbling around town she recognized an old apartment complex. Alex. She walked through the abandoned building and up the stairs. What was she going to do once he answered the door? Or what if Emilie did? What would she say happened to her? After all being tossed around like a rag doll, thrown to grounds, and getting shoved into things does leave a mark or two. Her back had ached, so did her head. She had blood in her hair, assuming that was when Billy had hit her with whatever it was he had done a good job. Is it really bad to tell them the truth? I mean afterall, it's not like they'll go looking for Billy or Andrew, they'll both be gone and no one would really give a damn. She knocked on the door and Emilie appeared in seconds.

"Oh my dear! What's happened to you?! It was that gang i warned you about! I told you to be careful! Come on in, sit, sit."

The whole time Emilie had rushed Holly in the apartments taking her bag and jacket off her and carefully pushing her towards the couch.  
"Mum! You're being right loud in here what's going on?" Alex appeared in the doorway in a navy blue suit.  
My does he look wonderfully beautiful.  
Alex looked down at Holly with a mixture of pain and confusion. He knelt down next to her.  
"What has happened to you?" He whispered.  
Emilie silently excused herself from the living room so the two of them could be alone.  
Holly shook her head , " I didn't think i'd ever go back to doing what i've done."  
Alex looked at her curiously, "And what have you done?"  
"Murdered." Holly whispered.

* * *

_After telling Alex what I had done, He took it quite well, in fact he seemed almost proud that i had done ol BillyBoy in. He was quite a grahzny bratchny. (Dirty Bastard) He was very interested in my unique way of killing him as well, after all not everyone in the violent community knows that a vial of pressured air could kill a man if you inject it into a victim's bloodstream. He also wanted to make sure i hadn't left anything at the Milk Bar, He knew the Rozz would definitely snoop around looking for evidence. So he left with his other droogies and said Holly could sleep in his room. Emilie had let me use the shower, it felt good after a night of being tossed around. It calmed my aching muscles. She also offered to wash my clothes. So i gave her what i had, a couple black tank tops, a couple green ones too, a couple pairs of jeans, my jacket, which left me with wearing nothing but a robe until laundry was done. I hid my bag in Alex's room, there's a lot in there no one should know about. I fell asleep right quick, knowing i was safe here, for awhile at least._


	8. Tea & A Nuclear Bomb Show

Alex POV

_I your humble narrator have never loved anyone. I've been drawn to several devotchkas in my life, but none quite like this. She was beautiful & strong. Not afraid of some twenty to one & ultra violence. When i asked my fellow droogies to help hide Andrews body they were curious, oh curious they were. I told them about Holly and her extreme acts of violence and they began to viddy what i viddied. They wanted her in our shaika (gang) they did. Thought she'd be a real horrorshow they did. I figured i'd ask her, but hell if i'd share her with my droogies. No never would i share my dear devotchka. When i returned to my room there she was sound asleep in my bed. Beautiful she was lying there sneeting (dreaming) her greatest wishes. I had hoped she was dreaming of me. For a second i'd been poisoned by the thought of having the 'ol in & out with her, but then in another second i wanted to leave her lay, and watch her spatchka (sleep). I was cautious to lay next to her. I didn't want her to think i wanted the ol in and out, which i did, but i digress. As of now all i wanted my brothers was to feel the presence of a lovely devotchka._

* * *

Holly POV

****_When i woke up Alex was laying next to me sound asleep. The curious thing was he was nowhere near me, and still fully clothed. He was wearing that silly white outfit he and his droogies wore while running about. I was still also fully robed, this wasn't what i was used to but it was quite nice. Being as quiet as i could, i grabbed my bag and snuck out into the living room. Pee & Em (which is what i had heard Alex call his parents) must've already left. So i figured it was safe to take a quick inventory check of what i had left in my bag. _

_My air pressured vial had broken, the needle wasn't attached anymore so it was useless, i tossed that out. _  
_My stiletto was still covered in dry blood, so i cleaned it off and put it back. _  
_I had a butterfly knife, which i only used for fun, nicked it from pawn shop. Still sharp and in good shape so i put that back. _  
_Five throwing stars that i also nicked from that pawn shop, all good so i cased them and put them back. _  
_A set of waterproof matches _  
_A yellow & black hazmat Zippo (still filled with lighter fluid) _  
_An Expandable Baton (black) _  
_A military green canteen filled with stale water, i dumped out the water and filled it with fresh water. _  
_I changed into my green tank top and jeans but put the rest of my clothes in the bag along with my gas mask. I heard Alex messing with his combination lock on his door so i went in the kitchen and began to make tea. _

"Well well well! This is a nice surprise my droogie. What are we having?"  
"Tea, but don't expect this often Drog." He walked over and stood behind her, breathing in her ear, he wrapped his arms around her waist. Her breathing changed dramatically.

* * *

Holly's POV

_As he stood behind me my heartbeat increased and i felt shaken. Why did he have to be so attractive? He put his hands around my waist and leaned close against me. Not this again, he needs to know i'm not that kindof dovotchka._

* * *

Alex's POV

_When i put my arms around her i could feel her body quiver beneath me. She was a quite complex character, just when i thought i could lean in and kiss her she turned around fast and pushed me away. _

_"You know i'd never hurt cha Holly." I tried to walk towards her. She was shaking and her eyes were dark, she was terrifyingly beautiful. Like a nuclear bomb show. _  
_"Don't! No, just get away from me." Boom. _  
_"You don't understand what i'm like... Back off!" Boom. _  
_The teapot began screaming behind her and she rushed past me, grabbed her bag and left. Just then i knew what i had to do my brothers. I went after her._


	9. Protector

**Holly's POV**

_I could hear him chasing me down the stairs. But I wasn't going to let him catch me weak this time. No, not this time. I ran fast down the stairs, jumping landing to landing at one time. I landed wrong on one, i stayed on the ground then. That one had hurt. _  
_"Are you done trying to kill yourself love?" Alex knelt down next to me. _  
_I smirked as i looked up at him. He grinned back. How was it at this moment i found his edgy sarcasm sexy? He motioned to put his arm around me and help me up, i didn't refuse this time. I wrapped my arm around his neck and we headed down the stairs. Alex's droogs were sitting in the abandoned lobby. _  
_"Welly welly welly well! Hi Hi Hi there my droogies! To what do i owe the pleasure?" _  
_"We was just makin sure you got home back to Holly, seems Billyboys gang are back out on the streets." _  
_"Looking for Holly, they are." _  
_"We outta go after them!" _  
_"Yeah!" two of them chorused. _  
_Alex set me down on the stairs and whistled loudly as he stood up. All of the boys jumped at the loud noise, they all went quiet. _  
_"Now, i as your droogan leader ought to make the choices? yeah?" _  
_"Aren't you concerned about my safety Alex?" I stood up and crossed my arms. He looked at me shocked for a second, and then grinned. He knew i was just bullshitting. _  
_"Holly my dear, i will never again underestimate your capability of defending yourself." I smirked. _  
_"Well if you want MY opinion, i wanna go after those filthy dogs. They deserve a bit of the, what did you call it Alex? Twenty to one?I'll go by myself if i gotta." I grinned. Alex's face fell. _  
_"You know i don't want anything bad to happen to you" he whispered. Dim, i think it was stood up_  
_"why you just said she could take care of herself, you said-" Alex hit Dim across the top of the head with his cane. _  
_"I know very well what i said Dim!" he looked fierce._****

Alex POV

_When i was supporting Holly and walking down the stairs I knew i had to watch her. She was a tricky devotchka to handle, i had to be careful. When we got down to the lobby my droogs were there waiting for me. _  
_"Welly Welly Welly well! Hi Hi Hi there, to what do i owe the pleasure?" They had warned us about Billyboys gang getting out of the hospital, and wanting to get revenge on Holly, i wasn't going to let anyone hurt her. But of course i would be the one to go after Billyboys gang, i would be the one to protect her, not them. I whistled loudly and watched all the droogs go silent. They knew i had authority. _  
_"Aren't you concerned about my safety Alex?" I heard Holly say behind me. I turned and said " Holly my dear, i will never again underestimate your capability of defending yourself." _  
_She said she wanted to go after them, by herself if necessary. My face fell, i wouldn't allow it, i'm not going to lose her. _  
_"You know i don't want anything bad to happen to you." I whispered, more to myself, but she heard it, so did Dim._  
_"why you just said she could take care of herself, you said-" Anger bubbled up inside my guttiwutts. I hit him on the head with my cane. I wanted to keep Holly safe, but i didn't want her to run away from her protector, me. _


	10. Chapter 10 (short)

**Authors note: Time lapsed to later that evening.**

Holly POV

_I didn't dwell long on Alex's odd behavior in the lobby, but i was curious. How could one character be so complex? As we were walking the grazzy streets i noticed he was watching me as i was thinking about my feelings on, well about everything i guess. Whenever catch him looking at me he'd look away. I wasn't looking for any relationship with Alex DeLarge, I needed his company, for a moment, but now it's time for me to move on. I was hoping i could get away with going by myself after Billyboys gang. But after the scene in the lobby I realised it'd be harder to escape Alex than i wanted it to be. It is hard, because i want to leave behind this violent life, yet i know no other way. He should understand, but he doesn't. I've heard the things people have said about him, he's changed alot since i've been acquainted with him. I'd hate to be the cause of this change. We walked into the old casino, my usual military style had been changed to a white v neck tee shirt, black jeans, my same ol combat boots, and a black bowler hat, and just like Alex, long fake eyelashes on my right glazzy. Billyboys gang was there. They were a group conversing about something. We ran in with our whips and chains and knives, and the twenty to one had begun. We were all screaming and having a real horrorshow time, as i was going after one of the boys in military garb i realized this was my chance to run off. Alex would never notice. So i snuck off into the darkness. Hoping that i'd never see Alex DeLarge again. _  
**  
Alex POV **

****_As we were walking the streets at the late hour i couldn't help but stare at Holly. She looked real horrorshow now that she looked like one of us. I decided i never wanted to see her leave. She means alot to me, and i wasnt going to see her get hurt. As we were going at Billyboys gang i saw her sneak away in the darkness. I wanted to make sure she wasnt hurt, so i followed her._

__**Author's Note: This has got to be the shortest chapter, i had just gotten off of work and needed to head home so i wrote this one to hold ya'll off. **


	11. Ending

I was running in an abandoned building. Alex was behind me, trying to get me to stop running. I was done with pretending that i was a good person getting rid of all those assholes on the street. I was one of those assholes. But not for long. Life had gotten quite boring for me, and i thought, you know what sounds like an awfully big adventure? Dyeing. As Alex chased me i realized this goodbye wasn't going to be a good one. Not easy either. I ran into one of the rooms and locked it behind me. Alex pounding on the door.  
"Holly! let me in!" He kept trying and trying. But i didn't budge. I opened my bag , which contained the most pleasurable way to die. Overdosing. In the time from the lobby, to heading to the casino i had picked up a few things. a few things that'd make this night, my last night. They say heroine attacks a persons minds in different ways. I figured i'd find out. I put the needle in several different spots in my arms, leaving small briuses, my body wasn't used to this kind of abuse. At first i felt like i was falling. As i lay there my focus shifted. Everything was moving. Time for part two. I opened up a bottle of whiskey and drank it as fast as i could. When i got to the bottom i walked over to the window and threw up. Alex broke down the door. He looked around with tears in his eyes.  
"Holly.. what are you doing?" I walked over by my stuff and sat down. He sat down in front of me.  
"You wanna smoke a j?" i asked. He looked at me curiously. I started rolling a joint. I lit it, hit it, and past it to Alex. roll roll roll a joint, twist it at the ends, light it up & take a puff, then pass it to your friend. I wasn't exactly thinking clearly anymore. I don't remember much after that. Just silence. When Alex was talking to me i couldn't hear what he was saying. I took another needle and put it under my skin. Alex tried pulling it out but i hit him. He looked at me shocked. As i lie there slowly falling, but also floating in a way, he leaned over me and kissed me. At that moment i didn't want to die, but i could tell that i was dying. Tears formed in his eyes as everything went black to me. I swear i saw him say i love you but i was too lost in my selfish act now. As i slowly fell i remembered a song i had heard before i was the wreck i am now.

Sweet Dreams are made of this,  
Who am i to disagree?  
I travelled the world & the seven seas.  
Everybodys looking for something.  
Some of them want to use you  
Some of them want to get used by you  
Some of them want to abuse you  
Some of them want to be abused


End file.
